This sucks!

Why in the world is this happening??? We had 2 awesome embryos transferred and still no good news to share! Yep, it's official, this cycle is a bust. I'm compiling my questions for Dr. J now, so if you have any suggestions, let me know! Our consult is in 2 weeks and hopefully we'll walk away feeling good.

We've been down this road before.

Today was the first beta test - at 12dp3dt...and my hcg was at 16. Not a yes, not a no. Now we just wait until Thursday when we have another test and pray that the number doubles or more.

I'm trying to keep positive especially considering what GREAT embryos we had transferred, but I can't help remembering what we went through in October. We're praying that this time there will be a different result...a baby!

I know that I have done what I can and now it is up to God and His plan for us.

4dp3dt

In case you are confused by the titles the past two days...here's how to decipher it: 4 days past 3 day transfer (or 4dp3dt).

I talked to the IVF lab this morning. We have nothing to freeze. The two they were watching made it to the blastocyst stage (step one of being able to freeze), but they did not have an inner cell mass. Had no clue what that meant so here is a picture I found on wikipedia:

It appears that the inner cell mass is what actually allows the baby to grow and develop so they do not freeze if it isn't there. She was quick to remind me that all fertilized eggs are different so not to be concerned about the ones that were transferred. And, to be honest, I hadn't even thought about that until she said it. Thanks!

I also checked the grading for the two we had transferred because I didn't recall finding out on Thursday - the 8 cell was graded 3+. I believe they grade on a 1-4 scale with 4 being the best, is this right, Jamie? (another question I should have asked before getting off the phone). Apparently, they do not grade the morula's, but she said that it was very nice.

3dp3dt

Well, it's been three days since the transfer, and I got out of the house for the first time today. I try to lay on the couch and relax Thursday and Friday, but when you have a dog who thinks they need to go outside every 20 minutes and your husband is back at work it makes it pretty difficult! :-) Jason did go into work on Thursday night and all day Friday, but he has been great - he's done a ton of laundry (except putting it away, guess that's my job), emptied the dishwasher, gotten meals together and ran a couple errands for me. On Saturday, my friend, Mel, came over and insisted on doing some things around the house. Thanks, Mel!

Our friends, Jim, Heather, and Addison came to visit on Saturday night. The boys went to a birthday party for a friend while the girls hung out at the house. I couldn't believe how big Addison has gotten! It was almost two months ago the last time we saw her, and she has changed so much! What a doll!

This morning, I made it to church and then even ran to Meijer to grab a couple things. It's amazing how tired I was after just those two little things, but I guess that's bound to happen when I haven't been doing much of anything for the past 2.5 days.

The lab called this morning. I missed their call by 2 minutes, and when I called back I had to leave a message. Guess I'll hear tomorrow if our two other embies made it to freeze.

It's back to work tomorrow for me. Nice thing is that work is busy, and I've got a ton of shows that I love right now. Hopefully that means the next 10 or so days will go by quickly. :-)

Thanks for all of your great and encouraging comments!!

Cady - I couldn't find any great definition of a morula on the internet. So, how I understand it is that it is further along than the 8 cell but before the blastocyst . They are not able to count the cells because they are compacting. The biologist told me it was a good thing so that's all I really went on.

Transfer Day!

Today was the day! We left yesterday afternoon, stopped for dinner at The Beef House and made our way to Indy. I slept pretty good, but did wake up a few times this morning and was praying that we would have 2-8 celled embryos to transfer this morning. I drank my 24-32 ounces of water, took the valium, and we waited to be called back once we got to the hospital. We got checked in with the nurse and the biologist brought us the picture of our two embyros we were transfering today....an 8 cell and a compact morula!!! I couldn't believe it! (Sorry for the poor quality of the pic, but the scanner was broken so we had to take a picture of it.)

We still have two growing....that hopefully will make it to freeze. They were at a 6 cell and a 7 cell. I'll know more on Saturday.

For now, I'm hanging on the couch (and SO glad we got this laptop!). I'll be watching tv, playing on the internet, and reading...no housework or running errands for me! Back to work on Monday than waiting for the blood test.

Grow, grow, grow!!!

I talked to the biologist this morning who told me that four of the six eggs retrieved are showing signs of fertilization!!! The other two, they weren't able to do anything with because they were too young. So, that is good news! Now, our prayer is that they will continue to GROW to beautiful 8 celled embryos! We are definitely scheduled for a three day transfer, which means we'll be back in Indy on Thursday.

Egg Retrieval

Today went pretty well! We drove to Indy last night since we needed to be at the hospital at 6:45am. Once we got the hospital, and I was called back things went quickly. The nurse got the paperwork signed, I got changed, the IVF lab rep came in to discuss what they were going to do, and then the anesthesiologist came in. Funny story here...he asked Jason if he was my ride. If you know my husband, at all, his response won't surprise you, but it had us all laughing! He said, "Yes, and I'll drive her home, too!" Go figure, never a servious moment with him. The anesthesiologist also mentioned that I looked familiar. I told him, "No" and that I hopefully won't have to see him again. (not being mean, just praying that this time works) He was very nice.

After this, I was surprised that Dr. Jarrett, himself, wheeled me to the OR. I walked in, got on the table, and the last thing I remember was the nurse putting the blood pressure cuff on. I woke up 20 minutes later back in the first room, and Jason walked in.

He told me they got 6 eggs. I will admit that I was a little disappointed. I had hoped for a few more, but also prayed that God would allow them to retrieve exactly what we needed. I know it only takes one, but it still would have been reassuring to have more.

So, now, we pray that they are being fertilitzed and growing exactly how they should! I'll have more to update tomorrow. For now, I think I am going to take a nap!

Retrieval is scheduled!

Yes, you read that right...our retrieval is scheduled for Monday morning in Ind.ianapolis (time TBD)! I can't believe the time is finally here to do this, but I am so excited to get this done and get our BFP!

I had my b/w and u/s this morning and things were looking pretty good. This time there were six measurable follicles with four of them being mature. I'm really hoping that by Monday they are able to get a few more than six since I'm still taking the stims today and tomorrow.

We'll be making the trek to Urbana for our pre-op appointment tomorrow morning and will get more details then. Should make an interesting Valentine's evening...we're having dinner with friends, and I'm going to have to do the Ovi.drel injection. Hopefully the timing will work out perfectly especially since it has to remain refrigerated.

Grow follies!

It seems like forever since my last appointment so I just had no clue how today would go. But, it went just as the doctor had hoped. I've been on the Bra.velle/Men.opur mix for six days now, and I've got two measurable follicles on each ovary with five more on each a little smaller. I was hoping for a couple more larger ones, but I've still got some time. I'm to continue what I have been doing and go back on Friday morning for another blood draw and ultrasound.

I forgot to ask how many they were hoping for, but they didn't seem concerned so I guess that is good. I'm hoping that when I go back on Friday there are a few more on each side that are large enough.

For those that have been through it, does this sound about right? My estimated retrieval date is Monday.

We're moving ahead...

On the IVF front, I had an appointment last week that included bloodwork (E2 =22) and ultrasound (10 on the left and 11 on the right) and my annual (yes, fun, I know!). Everything looked good, so we are continuing towards the first ivf. I started the lupron on Monday night. Not too bad, I had read a lot about headaches while on lupron so I was kind of concerned since I tend to get headaches anyway. I just had one on Wednesday night, but took some Tylenol and everything seemed fine thank goodness. The last bcp is tomorrow then I start the Bra.velle/Men.opur on Friday. I'm really excited to see how this all works out...praying for a positive and for all my fellow bloggers who want their positive, too!

$3,022.66

You might be wondering what cost us this amount of money...but, can I just say that I am SO thankful for insurance!! This is the amount that our insurance saved us for the medicine for our first IVF! We still paid out $133.89, and I'm sure there is more to come.

I tried to take a picture of what over $3,000 worth of medicines looks like last night, but my camera battery was dead. This doesn't even include the birth control pill, baby aspirin, pre-natal vitamins (yes, I know, weird to be on this and the pill!), or the progesterone (I had a ton left over from the last IUI).

To Freeze or Not to Freeze??

That is the question of the day. For those who don't know, during IVF you have the option to freeze embryos for future attempts at babies. Insurance doesn't cover the freezing, storing, or thawing so it's about $600 a year (or so - I don't have the exact figure). But, this is something that has to be decided before the consent forms get signed and turned in to our RE's office next week.

In the beginning I wasn't too sure how I felt about it, but now I think it's a good idea for a couple reasons. First, insurance will cover an unlimited number of FET's (Frozen Embryo Transfers). Second, this means that they will attempt to fertilize all of the retrieved eggs (part with ICSI, part on their own). Our doctor has strongly recommended that we consider freezing.

I also assume that just because we decide not to freeze this time (if that's what we decide), we could freeze in the future. The only thing is that insurance will not cover the transfer of embryos frozen from your last covered fresh cycle - does that make sense? For example, we get pregnant and have a baby with our final fresh cycle, they wouldn't cover any frozen embryo transfers that came from that retrieval.

The big concern about freezing is that we would have frozen embryos left over and not know what to do with them. You are given options to donate them to another couple or for research, but I'm not sure we agree on that. If we don't agree to freeze this cycle, that means the doctor will only fertilize the three eggs which makes the chances go down.

So, what I am wondering is....what do you all think??

Also wanted to say THANKS for all the comments lately!! It's been great seeing who is watching the blog. I know there are a lot more of you out there, so don't be shy and leave us a comment! :-)

IVF Plan

Our meeting with Dr. J went really well yesterday. He gave us two options (Laparoscopy or IVF) with the suggestion to do IVF first since insurance covers it. We agreed to move on to IVF w/ICSI (Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection).

So, here's the plan:

Continue on birth control pills until January 31st
Start Lupron on January 26th
Baseline Ultrasound and Bloodwork on January 28th
Start FSH (Bravelle/Menopur) on February 6th
Estimated ER is February 16th

And, we had to give about six vials of blood and a urine sample today. Woo hoo!!

Where do we go from here?

We have finally made/gotten a decision about our next step in the attempt to have a baby! Jason and I weren't sure if our doctor would recommend that we do another IUI or move on to IVF. I spent the last couple weeks talking to a friend who has been through the treatments and to one of the nurses so I was leaning towards moving on to IVF. It was a big step for me to be willing to move on because I felt like this was the end of the road...IVF is the most advanced you can get and insurance only pays for a limited number. Jason wanted to go off of the doctor's recommendation. The nurse did some research for me on insurance coverage, and I was very relieved to find out that they also pay for frozen cycles! This is really good news since we plan to have more than one baby (Lord willing).

I finally got the call from our doctor this week. He felt that moving on to IVF would be a good thing, especially since our insurance would cover it. It definitely increases our chances of success!

So, I have already started back on the pill. We meet with him next Thursday to get our protocol! I'm so excited to have a plan and am praying that this will be the perfect timing.